Time for another entry in Friday Fictioneers challenge, courtesy of Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. If you want to give it a try, check the info on her blog. 100 words more or less, inspired by a photo, here we go….
Copyright – J Hardy Carroll
The fire is gone. I see it now.
In the way you notice silver in my hair…
Or how your eyes glide over my weathered body…
“Fourteen years is not much of a difference” your eyes smiled back then. I smiled back at your youthfulness and let you play with my heart. I wonder if slow burn with someone closer to my age would hurt less than this wild fire we had.
You say you love me and I know you believe it…
But I see the truth in your eyes…
I lost before it ever started.
Ah, yes, I wonder about the relationships with a huge age difference – I’ve seen a few crumble as the years move on and lovers become carers. Wonderful stuff and a lovely choice of song too
You’ve written a poignant and beautiful story – I absolutely love it. You evoke both the flaws of now, and the wonder of then so that we can mourn with the narrator the passing of time, and exult with her in the joy she has experienced. Delightful, clever, sensitive writing!
So nice to have you back, Loré.. and with a most beautiful piece of writing.
I do know it can happen successfully though I fear most end up like your sweet woman…
“I lost before it even started” is such a lovely line and I’ve never thought about it – but you are absolutely so astute and shrewd when it comes to explaining a failed romance. Really, I am impressed!
Snow's Fissures and Fractures 
Nice interpretation of the prompt.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes. The age gap matters, unless both are exemplary people.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Exemplars are rarity.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Really good take. I read it twice, it felt even more melancholy the second time.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Twice? Thank you!
LikeLike
Good to see you Lorie. 🙂 Interesting take with an apt soundtrack.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLike
A nice take on the prompt.
DJ
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you.
LikeLike
The soundtrack went well with your well written story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glad you liked it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sad story indeed.
LikeLiked by 1 person
If there was love even for a moment, can it really be a sad story? Tnx for stopping by.
LikeLike
Love the metaphor this inspired in you. Sad and lovely.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Much appreciated!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Loré,
So nice to see you here. Lovely and sad. So much story in few words. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s been a while, feels good to stretch my legs. 😀 Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well done with the music connection! ^_^
LikeLiked by 1 person
What is life without music? Glad you liked it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A sad story made all the more poignant when accompanied by the late lamented Amy Winehouse.
Click to read my FriFic!
LikeLiked by 1 person
She was one of a kind.
LikeLike
My wife periodically dyes her hair, but not for me. I’m totally fine with the “silver fox” look.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Every time I mention she doesn’t have to dye her hair she gives me “the look.” I don’t mention it anymore.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That was fabulous – and knowing several couples with quite big age differences, I think this scenario is true in some cases.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mostly when the woman is older. Years are not kind to us, neither is society.
LikeLike
Ah, yes, I wonder about the relationships with a huge age difference – I’ve seen a few crumble as the years move on and lovers become carers. Wonderful stuff and a lovely choice of song too
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Lynn!
LikeLiked by 1 person
My pleasure 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’ve written a poignant and beautiful story – I absolutely love it. You evoke both the flaws of now, and the wonder of then so that we can mourn with the narrator the passing of time, and exult with her in the joy she has experienced. Delightful, clever, sensitive writing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
So many kind words, thank you so much!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Such a sad story, very well told.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent use of the prompt. Age is a sneak thief.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed it is. Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your take on the prompt was a nice surprise, a well told if bittersweet tale.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Much appreciated.
LikeLike
That slow burn is a gem of a line. Superb piece – loved the poignancy of it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Sandra!
LikeLike
It’s easy to say that age doesn’t matter, but in this ever speeding life it does. Nicely done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It shouldn’t and it should, age is a treacherous companion.
LikeLike
Fourteen years – if the genders were reversed no-one would even comment.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is what my story is about, thank you for recognizing it.
LikeLike
Romance has its season. It hurts when winter arrives and you watch the fire wane. Great interpretation of the image.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, very kind words.
LikeLike
A great take and beautifully executed.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you.
LikeLike
It is almost like a poem…great take on the prompt.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glad you liked it, thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Poignantly real and fatalistically real!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very kind words, thank you.
LikeLike
👍
LikeLike
So nice to have you back, Loré.. and with a most beautiful piece of writing.
I do know it can happen successfully though I fear most end up like your sweet woman…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good to be back, Dale. Thank you!
LikeLike
I love how you do this.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nothing burns forever… but the glow of ember can warm you too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
So true…
LikeLike
“I lost before it even started” is such a lovely line and I’ve never thought about it – but you are absolutely so astute and shrewd when it comes to explaining a failed romance. Really, I am impressed!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, your words are too kind. Thank you, Nan!
LikeLike
Beautiful!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Much appreciated.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It works for some but not others. Good story and writing, Lore`. —- Suzanne
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Suzanne.
LikeLiked by 1 person