Time for another entry in Friday Fictioneers challenge, courtesy of Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. If you want to give it a try, check the info on her blog. 100 words more or less, inspired by a photo, here we go….
Copyright – Jennifer Pendergast
Freedom…an unfamiliar thing far removed from her mind. Life marked by different prisons…always held back by invisible ties, swaying from one master to another. And still, every move brought her closer to deliverance.
An orphan hungry for love surrendered to the hands of a cruel stranger…
A sex slave craving death, choosing a warrior path that would bring her closer to the gates of hell…
A soldier betrayed by those she fought for, left for dead…
She rides on a train without a schedule, heading to the unknown, with time as her only commodity…will she trade vengeance for freedom?
Yes, after due consideration, and bearing in mind what she’s been through, my money’s on the vengeance. I’m cold-blooded like that. Great story, I felt for your heroine.
Glad you liked my words. The form – it is always an experiment, exploring what works and what doesn’t…I think flash ficiton is great for this kind of exploration.
You did a great job capturing the formless void of all the time and freedom the character has after the rigid live of slavery and servitude, and all in just a few words too. Great job!
-David
Oh, Doug…your words always put a smile on my face. Actually, she has been on my mind for quite some time…my “Wayward Soldier” MC, I do hope this snippets grow into something bigger.
Interesting, another person didn’t think different fonts added anything to the story. That is why I like to play with the form, challenging readers in unusual ways. I am happy you liked the story and the form, thank you so much.
I can see how it can sound like a cliche, but I guess it can fly by in this short version. I have the entire story in my head, so I have a sort of an advantage over my readers.
You painted a great picture of the painful path life thrust her upon. I think she has great awareness of where she is and where’s she’s headed, even though she’s not happy about either. I’m rooting for her, but not optimistic of her outcome. Well written piece.
I like the way you’ve crafted this: good choice of words.
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Thank you, glad you enjoyed it.
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Yes, after due consideration, and bearing in mind what she’s been through, my money’s on the vengeance. I’m cold-blooded like that. Great story, I felt for your heroine.
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I don’t know, I am still exploring her character. Thank you, Sandra.
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The way her life went, being betrayed by everyone she met, I’d bet on vengeance as well. Great story.
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There wouldn’t be a story if she went peacefully.
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Wow! That’s all i can say!
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Well, thank you for that.
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This crashes through much like a freight train, leaving us with a whole life in just a 100 words. I wouldn’t bet against the vengaence either…
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After all, freedom is far removed from her mind. Thank you for this inspiring photo.
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Love the ambition in this peace. Personally I don’t think the change in font size adds anything. But the words are spot on.
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Glad you liked my words. The form – it is always an experiment, exploring what works and what doesn’t…I think flash ficiton is great for this kind of exploration.
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A very powerful piece of writing and a brilliant take on the prompt. I think vengeance will win and I’d be backing her all the way. Well done 🙂
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It is nice to hear my herione has so many people in her corner. Thank you!
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Nice one…I vote for vengeance!
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Noted. 🙂 Thank you.
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Life marked by different prisons and She rides on a train without a schedule are tow of my favorite among many in this piece.
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Life marked by different prisons and She rides on a train without a schedule are two of my favorite among many in this piece.
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Thank you, Alicia. I hope this one will be expended in future, tested her in few FF stories and always got a great feedback.
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Is it possible that her hardships will make her an advocate?
That is where they come from, after all.
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I am on the fence with her, she could go either way.
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A very engaging and different take on the prompt!
I enjoyed this greatly.
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I am glad you enjoyed it. Thank you.
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You did a great job capturing the formless void of all the time and freedom the character has after the rigid live of slavery and servitude, and all in just a few words too. Great job!
-David
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Oh, you are very kind, David. Thank you.
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My pleasure. 🙂
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A very captivating piece, Lore.
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I am glad you liked it, Norma. Thank you.
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Very powerful with well crafted sentences. I agree with others – after all this vengeance is the way to go!
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Thank you for the lovely compliment.
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Life marked by different prisons. A very telling phrase that will stay with me.
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That is such a nice compliment, much appreciated.
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Dear Lore,
Whoa! Where are you taking us with this story? Wherever it is, I’m on board for the ride. Fantastic stuff.
Aloha,
Doug
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Oh, Doug…your words always put a smile on my face. Actually, she has been on my mind for quite some time…my “Wayward Soldier” MC, I do hope this snippets grow into something bigger.
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Great story. I loved the bold/large writing to highlight her pain.
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Interesting, another person didn’t think different fonts added anything to the story. That is why I like to play with the form, challenging readers in unusual ways. I am happy you liked the story and the form, thank you so much.
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I found that the words really jumped out at me and grabbed my attention.
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Great structure and an intriguing story despite a cliche or two.
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I can see how it can sound like a cliche, but I guess it can fly by in this short version. I have the entire story in my head, so I have a sort of an advantage over my readers.
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It has a “Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” feel to it. I like it.
Be well,
Tracey
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I haven’t thought about that one, but there is something about that. Thank you, much appreciated.
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Dear Loré,
Some tough choices after a tough life. A lot of story squeezed into a small space. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you, Rochelle. Maybe it’ too much story for100 words…
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I’d like her to be free. I hope she fnds out how to achieve that. Gripping story.
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You can’t squeeze everything in few words, but I think she’ll make a right choice.
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Interesting use of the fonts. To me it felt like listening to a dramatic movie trailer. Can’t wait for the sequel.
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Ah, glad you liked it.i have the same feel, movie trailer.
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This really reads like a dramatic intro to a movie or series– that I would really want to watch! I can hear the voice, the music swell… wow!
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Well, that was my intention. So happy you picked up on it. Thank you!
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So many reason to chose vengeance.. the trafficking is disgusting.. I just hope she will survive those ordeals.
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Sorry for the late reply, somehow I missed your comment. The longer she roams through my mind, the more I believe she is a survivor.
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You painted a great picture of the painful path life thrust her upon. I think she has great awareness of where she is and where’s she’s headed, even though she’s not happy about either. I’m rooting for her, but not optimistic of her outcome. Well written piece.
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Thank you so much! Be optimistic, she’s a survivor.
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