You ask me Who I want to be? Dare I return back to see? Where will I find the roots to my tree? Am I free?
Tony Maude of dVerse posted an interesting challenge today. To write, how shall I call it?…Once removed Cinquain.
The Cinquain is a five-line poem, invented by Adelaide Crapsey, an American poet. The first and last lines each have 2 syllables, with the intervening lines having 4, 6 and 8 syllables respectively. Tony asked us to write a five-line poem with 3, 5, 7 ,9 and 3 syllables.
I must say this challenge really intrigued me. Since English is not even my second language, sometimes it is hard to frame my emotions in a more technical verse form. I fell in love with acrostic form and it came surprisingly easy to me. When I read this latest challenge, I thought I might try it.
So, here is my humble offering. I have no idea if it is technically correct, but I gave my best. And if you don’t try it, you’ll never learn it.
hey your link @ dverse works fine….smiles.
questions…contemplative questions like that can be pandoras box
cause you ask one and another follows….where will i find the roots of my tree
is def a poignant one for all of us…
This one is very reflective of my current musings, the older I get, the more I think about such things. Thank you for reading it, it is much appreciated.
I am a sucker for rhyme. 🙂 My next project is a double acrostic with rhyme, why make it simple, when you can complicate it? Thank you for your kind words, Tony.
I like your comment, “why make it simple, when U can complicate it?”. Because my poetics tend to be verbose, I usually counter with, “Why use just one word, when ten will due?” Your poem is quite accomplished; congrats.
very cool. I like how you made your modified cinquain a set of questions, rather than a statement. I would have never guessed from your writing that English is not a first or second language for you.
The rhymes add a lot to the questions you ask. Actually I think by formulating this as questions you manage to make the poem larger than its brevity. To write this well in a third language is impressive.
Thank you, Björn. I think writing FF stories helped a lot, I always was good with languages, but this blog gave me more confidence.
As for this little poem, I was greatly influenced by Ryōkan Taigu, I am in love with the beautiful simplicity of his haiku.
I often have trouble with new forms of poetry, sometimes taking longer than Mr linky allows! Good job – the thing with poetry is we start with something – and fiddle with it and make it our own.
No sturggling with language there… and I think these brief forms work much better for those of us who don’t have English as a first language – we’re not so wedded to standard constructions and grammar. I love your self-interrogation – quite a philosophical poem.
hey your link @ dverse works fine….smiles.
questions…contemplative questions like that can be pandoras box
cause you ask one and another follows….where will i find the roots of my tree
is def a poignant one for all of us…
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This one is very reflective of my current musings, the older I get, the more I think about such things. Thank you for reading it, it is much appreciated.
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This is really good; you have the right number of syllables in each line – and you’ve rhymed them too.
If I could write even half this well in any language other than English, I’d be really proud of my achievement.
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I am a sucker for rhyme. 🙂 My next project is a double acrostic with rhyme, why make it simple, when you can complicate it? Thank you for your kind words, Tony.
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excellent! I don’t know this form but I love the thoughts you expressed in it while sticking to the syllabic sequence.
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I am still surprised how easy poetry comes to me. I never really liked it and suddenly it just exploded. Thank you, Cybele!
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Intriguing questions. Introspective verse. Very well penned.
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Thank you.
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Never stop asking questions. They are important. Lovely verse you’ve written.
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Thank you. I agree, we should always ask questions.
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I like your comment, “why make it simple, when U can complicate it?”. Because my poetics tend to be verbose, I usually counter with, “Why use just one word, when ten will due?” Your poem is quite accomplished; congrats.
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See, great minds think alike and all that. 🙂 Thank you.
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serious thoughts here… great reflect
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Thank you so much.
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I like the way your poem addresses free will vs destiny and the question of uniqueness vs heredity.
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I strongly believe in free will and making your own choices. Even in the darkness, we can find a way.
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Some questions are worth asking and force us to seek answers. Nice one.
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Thank you for your kind words.
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Questions beg for answering..
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And life begs for questions. Thank you.
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very cool. I like how you made your modified cinquain a set of questions, rather than a statement. I would have never guessed from your writing that English is not a first or second language for you.
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Thank you, that means a lot. I don’t actively use English in everyday life, but writing helps expanding my vocabulary.
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The rhymes add a lot to the questions you ask. Actually I think by formulating this as questions you manage to make the poem larger than its brevity. To write this well in a third language is impressive.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Björn. I think writing FF stories helped a lot, I always was good with languages, but this blog gave me more confidence.
As for this little poem, I was greatly influenced by Ryōkan Taigu, I am in love with the beautiful simplicity of his haiku.
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As you might know, English is not my first language either, but it is a clear second language for me…
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I often have trouble with new forms of poetry, sometimes taking longer than Mr linky allows! Good job – the thing with poetry is we start with something – and fiddle with it and make it our own.
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That’s the best description of my working process – fiddling! 😀 Thank you.
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No sturggling with language there… and I think these brief forms work much better for those of us who don’t have English as a first language – we’re not so wedded to standard constructions and grammar. I love your self-interrogation – quite a philosophical poem.
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In its simplicity, this one presented a great challenge. But I really like to try new things, to challenge myself. Thank you so much for stopping by.
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perfect philosophical form — questioning freedom and the bravery to see our lack of it.
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Thank you, glad you liked it.
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Powerful questions.
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Thank you!
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A very talented write.
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Thank you, much appreciated.
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You must dare. How else can you live?
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You are so right. Thank you.
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The idea of looking back to see who you will be is an intriguing one.
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I agree. Thank you for stopping by.
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Ah, looking back…somethings I might change…
Anna :o]
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